Saturday, February 12, 2011

Kiss away the pain

I am becoming quite positive that Josh knows when his Daddy has just left for a 48 or 72 hour shift, and chooses that exact moment to start cutting another tooth.
And usually it's when Mommy needs to go to bed early in order to make her 7-7 shift the next day, or be at class by 8 am the next morning(an hour and a half away). 
It's never when Daddy is going to be home or Mommy can sleep in.

Yet tonight I was happy when he started sobbing, instead of falling asleep, after being put into his crib.  Not happy that my little boy was in pain, but that he wanted to stay up.  Tonight was the first night my baby really seemed to want to cuddle or find comfort in his Mommy's arms.  Maybe we're just starting seperation anxiety, but he wailed tonight whenever I left the room.  All Josh wanted tonight was to be held and snuggle himself with his head on my shoulder.  Josh is not a cuddly baby, but tonight he just wanted Mommy.

I loved it.
I hadn't seen him since yesterday evening, so I treasured those few hours tonight he stayed up later than usual.  I kissed his blond hair, which sticks straight up, and rocked and walked and sang and finally crawled into my bed and tucked him next to me.  Josh was fine, you see, as long as he had his Mommy.  

For such a short time, he's going to believe that I really can kiss away pain.  That I really do hold the magical powers to keep his world safe and happy. 
For just a few brief years, I get to be Josh's Mommy.  I get to be the one he wants when it hurts.  The one whose bed he runs into to be comforted from a bad dream. 
I get to be the face that Josh looks for in the crowd.

So maybe I won't get a lot of sleep tonight.  That's okay.  One of these tomorrows, a tomorrow too soon in the coming, Josh will be too old for me to pick up and cuddle and kiss away the pain.  So tonight, I will be thankful for every one of these fleeting moments.


Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

It goes so fast! I loved this post.

Persuaded said...

You are a wise wise woman... my Noah has grown to be too big for mama's kisses and snuggles, but thankfully I have years and years of them stored up in my memory♥ I feel so badly for the folks that are so intent on teaching their tiny ones to be "independent" and "well disciplined" that they miss out on sooo much sweetness. Baby sweetness... and once that window is gone, it's gone forever. Unless you store it all up in your memories;-}